Diablo III In Development
When I counted down my favorite video games of all time, I really geeked out when I named Diablo 3 as the number 1 game of all time. I shouldn’t be so apologetic about it. That game was one of the best of all times. Now, I can hardly contain my excitement for Diablo 3, which was announced last week. I don’t know how many times I played through Diablo 2, but I know if Jarataur is out there somewhere he is with me in being super-psyched by this announcement.
I Give a Standing Ovation to WFNY
WFNY? That’s Waiting For Next Year for all you non-Cleveland sports fans out there. I have been talking about this ever since the draft and an article was written by John Hollinger proclaiming that the trade of Richard Jefferson from New Jersey was undeniable proof that LeBron James was on his way to the Nets when his contract expires in 2010. I have grown tired of the east-coast-centric bullshit that constantly beats the Cleveland Cavaliers, the city of Cleveland, and their fans into oblivion because in those tainted writers’ filthy brains somehow Cleveland isn’t good enough for a superstar of LeBron James’ caliber.
Well, I never wrote the perfect rebuttal. And now, I don’t have to bother trying.
RockKing (probably not his real name) at Waiting for Next Year has written it.
I won’t plagiarize it here, but he goes through it all. LeBron has already achieved amazing media success in Cleveland. He has made millions from the Cavaliers organization. He holds all the leverage in the world with Nike already. And finally, LeBron can’t possibly make any more money in the NBA than he can as a member of the Cleveland Cavaliers. In fact, with a few mathematical assumptions it is reasonable to assume that LeBron would have to leave somewhere in the neighborhood of $40 million on the table to leave Cleveland after years and escalators are taken into account. You see, LeBron won’t definitely stay in Cleveland, but this whole air of inevitability that everyone seems to put on that he will leave is a bit ridiculous.
Sharkwater Documentary Beatiful and Sad
A week or so ago, Jen and I watched the Sharkwater documentary. It is about a conservationist who is concerned about the shark fin trade. Sharks are fished and hunted and killed for their fins. The fins are like pieces of gold in Asian countries where Shark Fin Soup is not only a delicacy, but a culturally significant status symbol. As a result, the shark populations around the world are being ravaged in order to fill the demand for soup, and thus, money.
The documentary was brilliant. It had plenty of underwater scenes, and all the things you would expect. It also had a storyline where the filmmaker joins up with a rogue boat that goes after poachers’ boats with battering rams, and water canons. We have the rogue boat racing a coast guard to international waters so that they could avoid prosecution. It is more than your average documentary.
I am not a PETA member or anything like that, but this film will leave you wanting to help conserve sharks. I was on board relatively early in the film, but there was one scene in particular that just enraged me to the point that I wanted to run out and do something right away. You see the poachers catch sharks, pull them on the boat, and de-fin the sharks by hacking at their still-alive bodies with knives. After they remove anything resembling cartilage on the shark, they push the still-moving, breathing, soon-to-be carcass back overboard so that a completely immobilized shark can float to the bottom of the ocean to die a paralyzing death.
Watching from an underwater camera, we see one such shark float to the bottom of the ocean to die, but his eyes are still moving. I am getting goosebumps right now as I type it and it has been a couple weeks since I saw the movie.
Josh Homme BLASTS Abusive Audience Member
Note to self: Do not mess with Queens of the Stone Age lead man, Josh Homme. Apparently someone was throwing things at the band. Homme was sick and perturbed already. He unleashes one of the longest expletive-laced tirades I have ever seen. Oh yeah and then he throws a water bottle at the guy.
So, needless to say, if you have your speakers on, this video is not safe for work. Be warned the language is INTENSE.
We Are All Prudes in This Country
Can you imagine if someone tried to do this on national TV here in the United States? Australia might or might not have talent, but I like their sense of humor way better than ours.
I Suppose Australia Has Talent - Watch more free videos
Dax Riggs - Yesterday Cover
Dax Riggs used to be my favorite death metal singer on earth when he was the lead singer of Acid Bath. It has been a long damn time since he played in that band. Now he is 1/2 of Deadboy and the Elephantmen which has achieved a lot of cult success. But, he also apparently has played some bar gigs where he has broken out cool covers. My favorite so far is his version of Yesterday. Check it out before Yoko has it yanked of the internets.
Tiger Woods - Linebacker
Tiger Woods ad-libbed this little stunt during a commercial shoot for Buick. I wouldn’t like to be the guy who stole Tiger’s clubs.
Is M. Night Shyamalan Serious With The Happening?
M. Night Shyamalan has fallen a long way since his debut, The Sixth Sense. He was moving along nicely with Unbreakable, Signs before falling slightly with The Village. Then he hit the wall with Lady in the Water according to most critics. If you look at his career on RottenTomatoes.com it really tells the tale.
The Sixth Sense had an 84% approval rating. Unbreakable had 68% and then Signs jumped back up to 74%. The Village dropped down to 43% before Lady in the Water bottomed Mr. Shyamalan out at a horrendous 24%. Bottomed out, that is, until Shyamalan’s latest, The Happening starring Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel brings him to an all-new low of 20%.
So, exactly how bad is The Happening? The answer to that question depends. It depends, because I have a theory.
But first, The Happening really was that bad. It seemed disjointed. The performances were uneven and bad. It was tough, if not impossible, to feel anything for the characters. The development was nonexistent. Wahlberg and Deschanel are a married couple that has lost their spark. We are not quite sure why. We never really find out. All the strife that these characters have between them seems false at best, as if it was a horribly planted storyline used just to augment a standard sci-fi, bio-thriller storyline that serves as the base for The Happening.
Trust me. It was bad. This is where my theory comes in.
I think M. Night Shyamalan was mocking the concept of the summer movie. I know this is an outlandish claim, but follow with me for a second.
Mark Wahlberg seemed almost to be doing an impression of his character from Boogie Nights. Of course he was doing so with a different character - a high school science teacher - but the style and mannerisms of the Dirk Diggler character. He was sweet, innocent and seemed almost a little dumb or simple. I truly think it had to be a put-on. I have seen Mark Wahlberg act, and this wasn’t him trying to act well.
It didn’t stop with Mark Wahlberg. The tertiary characters in the movie seemed like cliched plants. It seemed as if Shyamalan was putting characters in to try and reference other over-the-top shlock-fests that pepper our movie screens every summer. The crazy old lady was a cross-reference between Tim Robbins’ character in War of the Worlds and the old lady who led the rebellion in Stephen King’s The Mist. The military policeman who was so innocent that he replaced his curses with “cheese and crackers” was impossible to believe as a real attempt at characterization.
That is the conclusion I came to. The Happening had to be a parody of summer movies. M. Night Shyamalan is defending himself against critics who have tried to sink him in his last two films. I get the feeling that Shyamalan feels punished for trying something new and different. His response? You want a typical movie? Shyamalan seems to be saying, “Fine. I will take all those awful, conventional things that people flock to see every summer and I will make a mockery of them.”
Either that, or Shyamalan has made the world’s largest, steaming, heaping pile of garbage and dragged Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel along with him for the ride. Unless your last name is Shyamalan, there probably is no way of knowing for sure. As of now, I will just assume Shyamalan is purposefully sending a message to critics.
The only other alternative is to contribute to that minuscule 20% approval rating from RottenTomatoes.com.
The Fire Theft - Heaven Video
It is nice to find that some of your favorite songs end up on the internets. Even the really rare-ish ones that never made it “big.”
How To Get More Pizza
Overhearing thoughts in the living room of a couple of scumbags.
I have this great idea. We need pizza for our party tonight, but I can’t afford to get four of them. I can only afford two. Our friends are really fat, though, and we clearly need four. I have this idea. I am going to order two large pizzas and you are going to go to the store with me. I am going to have the guy put the two pizzas up on the counter and then I am going to ask him to get me additional silverware. When he goes into the back of the store, you run in, steal the two pizzas and I will play the victim. The guy at the store better make me two new pizzas, which I will pay for and then we will get double the pizza.
Got it? Alright. Let’s go.
Thief Steals Dudes Pizza - Watch more free videos
Sideblog 
- FreeTheAirwaves.org Tuesday, 19 August 2008, 7:51 am
Google has a vested business interest in this project, but I am rooting for them anyway. Google wants to take that unused fuzzy space between TV channels and broadcast internet signals all over the. […] - Browns vs. Giants - Preseason Game 2 Live Blog at WFNY Monday, 18 August 2008, 4:19 pm
The nice guys over at Waiting for Next Year are going to be live-blogging their event in a chat room over at their site. I am a geek, and will be joining them. Come on over. - Dan Gilbert is My Hero Sunday, 10 August 2008, 5:46 am
Cleveland Cavaliers owner on all the LeBron James rumors, ”The reason this thing is where it’s at,” Gilbert said, ”is that we’ve got a bunch of bored, East Coast sports writers who have noth. […] - LeBron to Europe? I Don’t Think So Thursday, 7 August 2008, 4:22 am
So, while the major media continues to plot LeBron’s departure from Cleveland, there is a sane voice out there letting everyone know how unlikely the most outlandish scenarios truly are. - Top Gun 2???!?!?!??!?!? Wednesday, 23 July 2008, 5:50 am
According to reports, the plot outline is, (wait for it) “The idea is Maverick is at the Top Gun school as an instructor — and this time it is he who has to deal with a cocky new female pilot.” - Be Afraid Utah Tuesday, 22 July 2008, 7:26 am
Carlos Boozer is a snake and one of the most dishonorable people in professional sports history. I guess I am not over this just yet. - How much you wanna bet… Thursday, 3 July 2008, 9:18 pm
That this 4-day work week will actually increase the amount of gasoline that these employees will be using? Instead of commuting to work, they will now be going to the grocery store, going to do som. […] - In-Car DVD Players are Stupid Thursday, 26 June 2008, 10:15 am
At least they will be when we get a load of in-car wifi!!!!! (I am such a geek.) - George Carlin is Gone Monday, 23 June 2008, 4:34 am
I once bet a guy in college that I could watch a George Carlin special on HBO without laughing. I did it, but it wasn’t at all easy. There is going to be a void left by Carlin dying. - Accepted Behaviors Tend to Increase Thursday, 19 June 2008, 12:15 pm
If you become too accepting of a condition that you really don’t want to encourage, you might just end up with unintended consequences.
