FilteringCraig

Now that I am a homeowner, I have discovered what it is to be in a never-ending battle. And I have only lived here about 10 days! As I said before, over the weekend I bought a new couch and a microwave. No sooner do I finish one task, it is time to start another. The problem is that nothing changed from yesterday to today. I am going to keep breaking the rule of �if it ain�t broke, don�t fix it.�

I replaced one of the toilets in the house after I bought the house, but the other one (the one that I use most often) has got to go. It has the weakest little petunia smelling, �I like skipping instead of running�, �girley-mon� flush that I have ever seen. I even checked it out myself to make sure there was nothing I could do. The top fills with plenty of water, but it just doesn�t translate into an effective flush. I usually have to flush twice, which is unacceptable. Even if I don�t have to replace the entire toilet, I am going to have to replace the seat, which isn�t very securely attached. It is certainly not the throne that the king of a new castle deserves.

The other thing is the kitchen sink. When I bought the house and moved in, I was saying, �Replace it? Are you kidding me? I can live with almost anything. I won�t want to pay for that!� I am singing a vastly different tune now. As I clean off plates to put them in the dishwasher, I think a volcano enthusiast designed the basin floor of the sink. The water does not naturally run into the drain. It kind of collects around the outside. So every time I clean dishes I have to clean up after myself in the sink with a sponge. Also the faucet, while being a respectable brand, has done nothing to improve the situation with it�s less than powerful trickle. It sprays more like a decorative fountain than a kitchen sink. May I remind you, Kitchen Sink, that your purpose is to help me clean awful food off of my awful plates!

Oh yeah, and I would love to have the separate dish cleaning sprayer nozzle because those are just cool.

This guy has summarized almost all my views on free speech as it applies to the last 3 months or so, in a more entertaining way than I ever could.

CLICK HERE TO READ IT.
I left a quote below.

“When Madonna says that democracy is undermined whenever critics of the president are criticized, it makes me wonder what kind of train wreck her interpretation of the Kabbalah must be. (Martin) Sheen and his defenders want to be simultaneously saluted for their “courage” to speak out while at the same time believe they there should be no risks for those who do speak out. Well, if there are no risks, where’s the courage? And why should movie stars have a right to risk-free political speech when no other profession has anything close? If I owned a hardware store and put a sign in the window reading, “Down with Bush” � I’d lose business. Or, if I put one in the window saying “Down with Saddam!” I’d also lose business. This is because other people have the right to associate themselves with ideas just as much as movie stars have the right to express their “ideas.” Only by the logic of the bitchy little world we call Hollywood, where even men are divas, would we say it’s outrageous that store owners are having their “right” to sell three-penny nails revoked.”

-Jonah Goldberg Editor At-large National Review Online

I found this at Blogdex at MIT

Occasionally, I like to let you know what I am listening to and find out what everyone else is listening to. This morning on my way out the door I grabbed some CD�s to listen to, and it just hit me how completely different and random the selection is.

Pink Floyd � Animals � I don�t think I have to say anything about this one. Most people know it.

Tonic � Head on Straight � I think I might be the only person in America who owns this album. It is emotional adult contemporary rock, and a guilty pleasure.

Nine Inch Nails � And All that Could Have Been � This is a special CD with different, almost unplugged versions of NIN songs.

Thursday � Full Collapse � Indie/Emo/Hardcore band from New Jersey. The cover of the album when I bought it had a sticker that said something to the effect of, �This is what it would sound like if Morrissey had joined a hardcore band.�

Frederik Thordendal�s Special Defects/Sol Niger Within Version 3.33 � And yes that is the entire title of this crazy disc. This is the guitarist from Swedish metal band Meshuggah with his own experimental, eclectic disc which plays like a single traveling piece of work. I am not sure exactly what to classify this, but it has 28 tracks. Weird and compelling stuff.

Anyway, is that random enough for you? There is such a wide gap between Tonic and Frederik Thordendal, I can�t even tell you. Then throw in Pink Floyd and Thursday and you have a music fan on crack.

Let me know what crazy stuff you are listening to.

Ok, as long as I am forced to talk about Alan Thicke on my own site, (Thanks Deezo) I might as well create a trivia question.

WITHOUT LOOKING IT UP BECAUSE SADLY I DIDN’T HAVE TO,

What famous male singer sang the opening theme song to Growing Pains?

Seriously, do not look it up, and if you do, please don’t post the answer. This will have to be on the honor system, but I am willing to give it a shot. I want to see if this is in anyone’s common knowledge bank.

Later

I accomplished so many things this weekend.

Saturday, I cleaned up my apartment at Dover Farms, �a Luxurious Garden Community� and turned in the keys. Security deposit is pending, but I deserve double for the cleaning job I did.

I killed two birds with one stone at Best Buy. I needed a new hood to go over my stovetop and I needed a microwave. I found a good deal on a GE over-the-range microwave. If a microwave ever did rock, this one rocks. Also, can someone tell me when microwaves gained the ability to have metal in them? My new microwave has a metal cooking rack above the turntable, and it doesn�t explode.

Then I played golf with my friend Todd. I started well, and finished badly and shot a 53. He started badly and finished well with a 58. We have both vowed to get it into the 40�s, and I am confident we both can.

Saturday night I went to see a folk singer that was really good and then went to BW3 (a bar) near my house and ran into some old high school friends. This was especially good because I found out they bought a house about 3 blocks from my new house and I might have a couple more people to run with. Woohoo!

Sunday, I spent almost the whole day shopping with my sister. I bought a big sectional couch for my living room with a fold out couch and a recliner built in. 18 months same as cash financing, but it is going to take 4-6 weeks for it to come in unfortunately.

Then we went to Target and I bought a new comforter for my bed because my old one is falling apart. I thought I was done for the day, but my sister informed me that I needed to buy a matching bed skirt. So, because I didn�t have an option, I also bought a matching bed skirt.

I am so domesticated.

What cool things did you do this weekend? If someone can explain the microwave metal thing, I would appreciate it.

Hey everybody, two for one. Here is Mister Crunchy’s Phony Five, for when he thinks the Friday Five stinks.

1. Describe your ideal candidate for leader (President, Prime Minister, etc.) of the country in which you live. Please refrain from naming a political party. Everything else is fair game: platform, background, personal attributes, etc.

I would seriously like to get a businessperson in office. I think some other, greener things might fall by the wayside, which stinks, but I would love to see what a successful business person could do with the budgeting (or lack thereof) that goes on in our government today. I would like to see someone not only work on cutting money spent, but an increased visibility of cash flows and salaries.

2. If your ideal candidate somehow managed to get on a nationwide ballot, what would you estimate to be the probability that s/he would win? Why?

I estimate about a 30% chance because I think there are too many people who put their feelings first. People would like to be known as liking someone who tells it like it is, but I think they actually would prefer someone to blow smoke up their ass.

3. If your candidate was elected and everything went perfectly during his/her first term, what key changes would be made in your country? Please try to keep it in the realm of the possible.

I would hope we could eliminate some offices, focus groups and other safety nets that act as tools of waste and nepotism.

4. For what single accomplishment would your ideal president be most remembered?

Being hated by other politicians, but being adored by a country that can now see their money being spent.

5. Do you think your ideal president would be re-elected? Why?

Maybe. It comes down to a question of whether s/he can get any tangible results in a measly four year period, and whether the media machines are able to keep s/he afloat. There will be plenty of others trying to sink them.

1. What was the last TV show you watched?

The last show I watched was probably punk�d on MTV. This is the one where Ashton Kutcher plays pranks on his celebrity friends. It is good to see the likes of Jack Osbourne, Mandy Moore, Eliza Dushku and that guy from Backstreet get embarrassed with cameras around. This show will get old, but for now, I dig it.

2. What was the last thing you complained about and what was the problem?

Yesterday I was complaining about drivers on circles (rotaries) who don�t use turn signals when you are waiting, dependent on their move to figure out whether you can go or not. And as they come around without their turn signal, you assume you can�t go, as they slowly make the turn and you have missed an opportunity.

3. Who was the last person you complimented and what did you say?

I complimented my friend on his golf game. He had been telling me how bad he was, and I was pleasantly surprised when I played with him yesterday.

4. What was the last thing you threw away?

With the whole moving thing, the question should be what haven�t I thrown away.

5. What was the last website (besides this one) that you visited?

I actually downloaded yesterday�s Stern show before I left home this morning. Other than that, it was probably an email site.

Tomorrow is the end of the line. It will be the day that puts me completely over the edge. Tomorrow is the anti-holiday. A day so nasty and terrifying that it should be an automatic day off for me. I will have to go to bed early in preparation of an onslaught so severe that it makes me shudder at the thought.

I am preparing this year. I am lining up my proverbial arms. All the grenades, bombs, missiles and nerve gas that I can muster. I will meet all attacks with a vitriolic resistance. I will rule out no course of action. The U.S. Army used the extremely pretentious phrase �Shock and Awe.� Tomorrow for me will be a pre-emptive �shock and awe� of my own.

Tomorrow, April 24th, is �Take Your Brat to Work� day. For me it is, �I am an old fart at a manufacturing company, I feel insecure about my ever-rising age, which renders me more and more useless in a society that hates the old because they are considered worthless because of their decreasing physical and mental abilities, and because of all this I have to make fun of the youngest guy in the office to make myself feel better� day.

That�s right. Every �has-been�, �never-was�, even the �I once thought about being, but it never happened,� will be making nasty comments to me because they think it is funny to insinuate that I am not an employee but a child who has been brought to work.

So, in honor of this, I have come up with a pre-emptive list that I will keep at my disposal to fend off the old people who are so jealous of my youth that they will be on the offensive (and in my opinion, completely unfunny).

No, my mommy and daddy aren�t here. By the way is that a patch of blue coming in on the side of your head? In another year or so, you will be a full-blown blue-hair. That�s too bad.

No, I was able to drive myself to work today. By the way, what�s it like to get the free cup of coffee at Denny�s?

Wish me well, for tomorrow I go into battle. Grrr!

Although I wouldn�t normally touch a Hallmark movie with a ten foot pole, let alone one based on a John Grisham book, I am going to have to encourage that people watch the one this weekend. A Painted House will be shown on CBS at 9:00 pm this coming Sunday night. I have no idea who is acting in it, and I know there are going to be about a million commercials and whatever else goes along with TV movies.

In this case, I don�t really care. I read this book and it was amazing. The story was great, the characters and the character development was good, and there is plenty of action. So if the screenwriter retained some representation of the book, it should be good.

Also, I promise it has nothing to do with lawyers.

(Incidentally, this is the 100th post on my website. {Golf Clap})

I know some of you have heard my music, but I am looking to start writing/playing new music with a full band. I was talking to my friend Todd about that this weekend and it dawned on me exactly what kinds of players I want to play with. I would love to have a really good/diverse bass player because I think that would really make up for my less-than-stellar guitar abilities. For that same reason, I would also like to get a reasonably good guitar player that I might be able to somehow compliment with my minimalist playing.

This is the point when I got to thinking about a drummer. It occurred to me that I don�t want a great drummer. I don�t want someone with ridiculous ability. I just want a solid guy (or girl) who comprehends dynamics.

Maybe you guys don�t think about drummers a lot, but a drummer who is too good can sometimes take away from a band. There are cases where a great drummer is necessary like with Neal Peart of Rush, Danny Carey of Tool, or Jimmy Chamberlain of Smashing Pumpkins/Zwan, but there are also times when a Ringo will fit the bill.

The reason I know this is because these were my qualities as a drummer. For those of you who don�t know, I played drums before I ever played anything else. As a drummer, I feel confident in saying that I was always solid. I didn�t have the hand speed or level of coordination to play a lot of really complicated metal/progressive types of things, but if we were playing anything relatively standard, I could keep it right there. I always made sure to try not to overplay, and back off when there was something cool going on with the guitars or vocals. Covering up the band�s best assets is never a good idea.

Anyway, I was trying to think of drummers that overplay and I only thought of two.

Although I think he is a great drummer with terrific abilities, Carter Beauford of the Dave Matthews Band (That�s right all you frat boys/girls, there is a band there, it isn�t just �Dave�) had a tendency to overplay on their first two major albums, Under the Table and Dreaming and Crash. I think he was doing drum fills with 64th notes in some cases just filling with his entire drum kit. I thought it was cool for a while, and while it is hard to do, it is a little over the top for the style of music in my opinion.

The other drummer that I think was guilty of overplaying (and obviously a few people agreed with me as he was jettisoned from the band) was Dave Abbruzzese, who played with Pearl Jam in their early stages. He did not play on Ten (the album, that was Dave Krusen), but he played on their tours and subsequent albums up until No Code, or maybe the one before it. The worst example of overplaying that I saw in his case was the Pearl Jam Unplugged on MTV. He was just a little too busy for them as a band and it took away from the guitar solos and Eddie Vedder�s singing.

Does anyone have another example of an overplaying drummer? Or do I just think about it too much.

Also, if you want to play rock music and you live in the cleveland area, drop me an email at craig at filteringcraig dot com (If you spell out your email address like this, you can avoid lots of junk mail. Thanks Mr. Crunchy.)